Back to the grind

I am not going to even try to summarize the last few weeks of craziness around here. But I will say that we are very blessed and have some great memories of the Holidays in 212.

We greeted January 1st at Alexander, G9 style! Now we are home, full of good intentions and motivation. I am quite rested and itching to get back into our day to day routine. Ask me if I still feel this way in a couple of days. Hahahaha!

My mind is full of ways to make this year better. Along with nearly every other parent in the world...I vow to be a better parent. I feel myself growing as an individual and no matter how many nights I go to bed feeling extreme disappointement and self-loathing...I am so far beyond who I used to be.

 I am more patient. I am more compassionate. I am more aware.

My kids are absolutely amazing...but Abigail and Amelia fight every day. I choose to see it as prep for real life. They are learning to voice their opinions, defend their position and are going to have incredible conflict resolution skills. They are protective of each other, proud of each others accomplishments and the love that they share for their family is extreme and intense. This is enough. On the way back from Stephenville, they choose to swap outfits for the dolls they had gotten for Christmas. Then when we got home, Abigail voluntarily went into Mia's room to help her set up the legos. Made my heart swoon!!!

We sat at the dinner table last night and talked about resolutions and goals for 2013 and I admired my children for the glorious people they are. Each a unique creation and display of love and beauty. I am so blessed to be their Mom. We talked about how to make 2013 better and even though I do not have high expectations for the longevity of our "plans". It was nice just to sit and converse with them.

My main goal for 2013 is to open my eyes and to see "wishes" instead of weeds. This means that last night as I struggled to get kids into bed at a (semi) decent time so that I could breathe (and watch Parenthood uninterrupted) I felt myself getting agitated. I stopped...took a deep breath and decided to just go with it. Instead of being bitter that Axel was fighting sleep so persistently and that Ryan had already gone to bed,  I held him close and breathed in the last traces of baby.

I am determined to take and make time to cherish my children while I am able.

That is all :-)